Submitted by L_ANSARI on Wed, 10/04/2006 - 3:32am.

Day 63
October 3, 2006

In a fit of sheer nervous energy last night, I organized all my bras by color AND style, then matched them with their corresponding underwear.

I have had a restless night of sleep as well. I tossed and turned, woke up several times troubled by strange dreams and went back to sleep again. All day I have been thinking about the fragility of life and how easily it can be disrupted. NPR played an interview with a war correspondent who lost his hand throwing a grenade out of his HUM-V. Then there was today’s news on the treadmill about a guy who took little Amish girls hostage in a school and then shot half of them. This only served to reinforce my point; the fragility of human life.

Today is a big day. A lot is riding on an outcome that I won’t know until tonight. It is a reminder that all things can change in a heartbeat to alter your path, shake up your beliefs and challenge your convictions.

How does this relate to dieting you say? Well, for all my blustering about life’s fragility and its impact, it is really just a vehicle to:

A. Bring up my personal thoughts and feelings in a thinly veiled way.
B. Explain who all this anxiety has effected my appetite, because it totally has!!

I have been so freaky and anxious last night and today that I have not thought much about food. I had to force a banana and some diet yogurt. I was on the treadmill for 90 minutes in an attempt to burn off some of my agitation (this is really beyond energy) but it hardly made a dent. I left the gym ready to go jogging all around the neighborhood. As much as I appreciate the effect on my appetite, I really don’t want this kind of twitchiness 24 hours a day, seven days a week thank you.